More Alive Than Words: Life Lessons From A Tiger

Inspired by a woman who is no longer breathing, this tradition of looking back and acknowledging the lessons of a year gone by continues. And here I am, marking another trip around the sun. I no longer keep track of the numbers. Seriously, I could be 33, 35, 40, what really matters is that I’m not done yet. Instead, I’m stuffing my face with a chocolate croissant and a subtle macchiato in front of Waikiki Beach on the island of Oahu after the most epic shark dive of my life.

This year, more than ever, I’m aware of my impact. I’m aware that I can change the world. In my teens, when asked “What do you want to be when you grow up?” I would reply that I wanted to affect positive change for the better - in the largest way possible. I wanted to be a teacher - I just didn’t know what I’d be teaching. This year, I’m teaching others to become inspired. To believe in themselves. Teaching them about ways they can change the future of the world’s oceans. And to me, that’s the ultimate. Although next year my impact may even be bigger, brighter, more valuable.

This year, more than ever, I know who I am. I am comfortable in my own skin, even outside of my comfort zone, in new, daunting steps towards growth. Would you like an example? Yesterday, I was on a boat circled by five tiger sharks and when the captain asked, “Who wants to get in the water first?” my hand shot up. Slipping into the water without a splash, there was only deep blue and a trillion jellyfish. And then a white being rose up from the depths, she swam with purpose, rising to the top, to take her place as the apex, a female survivor, a tiger. She swam up within a few feet of my fins, heading for me, her eyes reading, calculating, seeing into my soul. She could feel my heart, and I tell you honestly and openly it was confident, ready, calculating my next move regarding her next move like a chess player with a 13-foot opponent.

Would I have been in this same heart space as a shark this size approached me twenty years ago? Ten? Probably not. To be safe around a shark, you have to hold eye contact to show them you are an equal. Control your mind and heart and keep that center of calm peace and love alive and strong. Own your space, hold it, and they give it to you. There’s a level of confidence and comfortability and trust that allows one to do this. The shark has a deep consciousness and knows you through and through on a cellular, electrical level. You can’t lie to a tiger - your heart will always tell the truth.

This year, I take my place as a leader. A teacher. A guide. I take my experience and life lessons and share them with others who may need to hear what I needed to when I was reaching for this sense of being.

This year, I confronted my demons. I now know what trauma I blacked out as a child to protect my fragile four-year old heart. I’ve looked deep into it, seen every aspect, and earned the right to move beyond it. Funny how your darkness will teach you so much about why you do what you do. And once you know, you have the keys to choosing different habits, different knee-jerk response to triggers.

I was in the water with the tiger because I wanted to meet her. I wanted to know the unknown. I wanted to see for myself who she was instead of going with what everyone else (and the media) said. In many ways, I have done the same with myself this year. To meet my best self, see what I am capable of and own that, beyond what others say about me.

So, what do I want you to know? What might I have learned this year of being fully alive that could help you on your journey?

In 3 days, millions of people will read in Forbes magazine what I found most important for changing the world for the oceans. In order for my message to be heard, I had to know what my message was. What did I want them to know? What would have the greatest affect for positive change?

In order to know my message, I had to know who I was. I had to see the place I could make a difference and apply myself. I found this by identifying my passion and flowing with it. The excitement I held for that passion was the key ingredient in fueling manifestation of what I wanted – to bring about positive change.

Find what lights you up and flow with it. Don’t let anyone take your excitement from you. It doesn’t have to make sense to them to be valid. Validate for yourself. It is your opinion that matters most.

If we hold back to maintain an image that we hope others will hold of us, we miss out on truly living in moments that will never return.

Find something you do well and don’t be afraid to own that power. We each have gifts, don’t be shy about being brilliant at something. If you don’t feel you’re brilliant at anything, don’t worry. Your passion is out there, just keep trying new things looking for what excites you. That’s an opening to your path.

Experience and practice make us capable. But another piece of being capable lies within trusting yourself. Believe you’ve got this.

When you find that thing that makes your heart smile, go BIG with it. Become a specialist in that area. Share that joy with others and it will always come back to you. We cannot use our candle to light a candle without gaining more light in our room.

Ask for what you want. But first, get really clear about what that is, and why you want it. Don’t get down when someone is not able to give it to you – that’s more of a reflection on them than it is on you. A ‘no’ doesn’t mean you’re not worthy of having what you want, it means you have to keep asking.

That voice in your head sets the tone for what will come into your life. The way we think is the vibe of our inner and ultimately our outer world. Lately, my inner voice is thrilled, excited, engaged, inspired and my life is a direct reflection of that. I’ve done the work to stop the self-judgment, the self-doubt, to bring kindness in and give it more attention than criticism. I look for what makes me smile, I engage in what makes me happy.

Deep within your mind, there’s past programming, negative conditioning, and little comments someone once said that hurt you which you have held on to. Do the work and let all that go. You don’t need it. Future you doesn’t need to remember that junk. When this comes up, replace it with a new line of thinking. The people who said those things can just fook right off.

Enjoy now. Don’t postpone your joy. Take the chance. Jump for that train heading where you want to be. It’s later than you think.

Here she comes, rising from the depths. She knows who she is down to the deepest electrical impulse of her heart, consciously aware of all around her. She knows her place in the world and her impact and owns them outright. She is capable, powerful, her best self. She is the tiger. She is a version of you. Are you ready to meet her?